Saturday, October 01, 2005

Extreme tourism

I just saw on the news that there's been another set of Bali bombings. The Australian government is recommending that Australians defer any travel to Indonesia. Upon seeing this television report, I reflected that these bombings must be severely damaging the Indonesian tourism industry.

That thought inspired an idea: Extreme tourism! In it, you would deliberately travel to a locale high in political unrest or terrorist activity; stay for a week; and if you don't get kidnapped or killed (or both!), you would fly home and brag about your adventures.

For those desiring an additional thrill, an additional $100 would gain you a Stars 'n' Stripes baseball hat, and a t-shirt that says "Hey! I'm an American! (Get used to it!)"

As with "extreme sports", I predict this "extreme tourism" will primarily attract males in their teens and twenties. Providing they embark on their "travel adventures" prior to reproducing, "extreme tourism" could have an inadvertent impact of a "Darwinian" nature.


--TG

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Hamster joke

Because the world can always use another hamster joke.

Received by e-mail -- most likely, through Gye Greene's Dad.


--TG

---------------

A mangy looking guy who goes into a restaurant and orders food. The waiter says, "No way. I don't think you can pay for it."

The guy says, "You're right. I don't have any money, but if I show you something you haven't seen before, will you give me the food?"

"Deal!" replies the waiter.

The guy reaches into his coat pocket and pulls out a hamster. He puts the hamster on the counter and it runs to the end, across the room, up the piano, jumps on the keyboard, and starts playing Gershwin songs. And the hamster is really good.

The waiter says, "You're right. I've never seen anything like that before. That hamster is truly good on the piano."

The guy downs the hamburger he ordered and asks the waiter for another.

"Money or another miracle," says the waiter.

The guy reaches into his coat again and pulls out a frog. He puts the frog on the counter, and the frog starts to sing. He has a marvelous voice and great pitch. A fine singer.

A stranger from the other end of the counter runs over to the guy and offers him $300 for the frog. The guy says, "It's a deal." He takes the three hundred and gives the stranger the frog. The stranger runs out of the restaurant.

The waiter says to the guy, "Are you crazy? You sold a singing frog for $300? It must have been worth millions."

"Not so", says the guy, "the hamster is also a ventriloquist."

Tuesday, September 27, 2005

E-mail scams

I once read that you can't scam an honest person. And, to a large extent, that is true: scams tend to prey upon someone trying to get ''something, for nothing''.

Or the very slow-witted, I suppose. But generally, dishonest people.


As an example, the so-called ''Nigerian'' scams, in which you are e-mailed by some foreign government offical, saying ''I'm not supposed to be doing this, but...'' Right there: If it's illegal in his country, maybe you shouldn't be getting involved -- perhaps?


Just a few days ago, I recieved this e-mail, which I've excerpted here:

TINUBU SQUARE, VICTORIA ISLAND,LAGOS-NIGERIA
FEDERAL REPUBLIC OF NIGERIA
CENTRAL BANK OF NIGERIA
TINUBU SQUARE, LAGOS

From the Desk Of: Mr. Igweson Andy
Executive Secretary Governor (CBN)

IMMEDIATE PAYMENT OF FUND

From the records of outstanding Clients/next of kin inheritancebeneficiaries due for payment with the Federal Government of Nigeria,your name as next on the list of the outstanding Clients whohave not received there last installment payments.


First of all, I know I don't have any relatives living in Nigeria. So, as an honest person, I would realize immediately that this message is mis-directed. (And, by the way, through what source did they [in error] recieve my e-mail address?) So an honest person would e-mail back, saying ''I'm sorry, but you have the wrong person.''


I wish to inform you that your payment is being processed and will be released to you as soon as you respond to this letter. Also note that from the record, your last installment balance credit is US$10.million dollars (Ten Million United States Dollars).

Now that's odd: What account would have a balance of exactly US$10,000,000? Particularly as it is in a foreign currency. Wouldn't it be -- at the very least -- plus or minus a few thousand? This seems... artificial.


Please re-confirm to me if this is inline with what we have in your record. Also re-confirm the followings:
1) your full name.
2) Phone, fax and mobile #.
3) Company name, position and address.
4) Profession, age and marital status.
5) Scanned copy of int'l passport.
6) Bank Details.

As soon as the information is received, your payment will be processed and effected to your nominated bank account or by cash depending on your preference.


If they have managed to contact me, shouldn't they have my full name?

Why should an estate settlement be concerned with my occupational information?

What relevance does a passport have with an estate settlement?

And, why should they need my bank details -- particularly if they also offer to send me the money in cash? Should they not just offer to send me a bank cheque?


Again: Only the dishonest, and/or dim.


--TG

Sunday, September 25, 2005

Old cars

I was restless at home, and thus thought I would walk around the property a bit. So, I took a few shots of The Lady's family's cars.

The Lady's family -- for whatever reason -- has a tendency to drive old Rovers. Her brother and his wife, who live next door each drive a Rover of a similar body type to the one GG and The Lady drive, as does The Lady's father, and Next-Door Uncle as well. Oddly, they are all either white, or a shade of green (of which GG approves!).

To the right is the car The Lady and GG drive. Behind is, under the carport, is The Lady's mother's car: you can't see it well, but it's a large, heavy hatchback with a sporty look.

The Lady's parents also have a few older Rovers in their back yard. I'm not sure why they have them there -- perhaps for eventual spare parts? However, they no longer match any of the cars they currently drive. The Lady says that back when her brother was in college, he started to restore one of them, but then ran out of time. However, Next-Door Uncle restores cars as a hobby, as is now retired -- so perhaps he will assist The Lady's brother (mostly by providing knowledge and tools).

This is an example of one of the older Rovers in the back yard. There used to be three, but aproximiately a month ago, The Lady's brother, GG and myself helped drag the car into the brother's back yard. He hopes to eventually convene all three cars there. And then? Who knows.


--TG